taylor, 24, dean is beautiful ♡

pray4jensen:

one of the things that i find so fucking malicious is how they silenced dean’s queerness so thoroughly that he wasn’t even allowed to speak. 

and i mean like literally.

when bobby tells him that cas helped jack fix heaven, dean doesn’t say anything. dean’s only allowed to smile vaguely and look off into the distance. he’s not allowed to utter a single word, right up from that moment until bobby starts talking again. he’s not allowed to ask where cas is, or even utter something neutral like “that sounds like something cas would do.” instead we have to assume that dean’s smile is for him. we have to assume that he’s happy because cas fixed heaven, but we can’t even be sure because bobby muddles cas’ contribution with talk of so many other things while dean is kept mute. the only time dean’s allowed to speak up is to express his fondness for his father’s beer and his female-coded car.

they made cas inconsequential, sure, but what’s more is that they made dean even more inconsequential. 15 seasons of dean’s voice leading us through thick and thin. 15 seasons of dean being the eyes and heart of the audience. 15 seasons of dean carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders, fighting tooth and nail to find freedom, only to be silenced completely because if he spoke, it would make him less straight, and frankly, i can’t find anything more despicable.

he loved a boy and for that, spn said he didn’t deserve to have a voice. he wanted something more and instead he wasn’t allowed to have love returned, happiness, or even a life. he was us, every queer fan who ever saw themselves in him, and spn said we were worth nothing because look, at the end of the day, a queer dean wasn’t worth anything either.

he got the heaven he deserved, bobby said, but that heaven was an empty soundless void. he got what he deserved but it was a quiet place that echoed the voice that he lost. he got what he deserved but cas’ very absence in his heaven told him that deserving something was very different from actually having it.